Sunday, January 24, 2010

I'd like to think I'm not self centered

I stopped by a store today. Once I was at the register, I set down my items. I was thinking about how hot Jennifer Aniston used to be when she was still on Friends. She was on the cover of some magazine, and I began to remember how I had a crush on her when I was a kid, and would watch Friends just to see her. I never really got the jokes in that show until I was older, but really I just wanted to see Jennifer Aniston. I've seen every episode about five times. Lost in thought, and completely unaware of anything besides Jennifer Aniston, I heard "Hey Bryan". It was the cashier. Sometimes I forget they exist and simply set my things down on the conveyor belt and let it do it's thing. Most of the time I don't even look at their faces when I give them my money. However, I always leave with a "thank you" and smile, as I've grown acustomed to do so, but don't really mean. I knew this cashier from somewhere, but I couldn't remember, I don't think I even tried to remember. I was just surprised to hear my name. I said "Hey, dude" since I couldn't remember his name, or who he even was. But it began coming to me, I knew him from my senior year in high school, I must have sat next to him in some class. I still couldn't remember his name or any conversation we might have had. This didn't surprise me, I forget most people within hours. I'm very self centered. "Did they ever call you back from Taco Bell?" he asked me. Who the hell was this guy! I applied for a job at Taco Bell a few months ago, and I'm pretty sure that I hadn't seen this guy since high school, how did he know about me applying there. I don't remember ever telling anyone about Taco Bell except for some girl I used to talk to a few months ago. "No....well they did, but I didn't get the job, it was for an interview, then I had a second interview but I never heard from them after that." I rambled because I was thinking about how self centered I must be to not remember this person. An example of my self centeredism would be how I was thinking about how self centred I was rather than remember who this person was. I think we exchanged about three more sentences, before I came to the conclusion that I am very self centered when it comes to guys and unatractive girls. I decided I would change in that moment, I wouldn't be so self centered anymore. So I asked him "So how have you been?"
"Good"
"So are you going to AWC?"
"NO I'm not going to school, I'm trying to save up some money so I could move to California." I heard a voice laughing in my head and saying "I don't care". I wanted to laugh. I managed to hold back and say "That's cool".He gave me my change. "Later Bryan" he said.
"Later dude" I said. I walked out of the store thinking about how I'm such a nice person and how I have so much to offer people.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Sleepy Cleaner

I'm sleepy, and I think I'm only a few minutes away from crashing out, so this might not make a whole lot of sense. I ended up procrastinating again today, I guess I'll do my homework tomorrow. Instead I've been cleaning my room all day, it's taken me about six hours and I still have not finished cleaning everything. It started when I tripped over some textbooks on my floor. This wasn't the first time, and everytime after the first time angered me more and more. After I finished cursing at the books, I decided I would try and organize them somewhere.
I have a pretty wide closet, with two doors that slide to open it. On each side in the inside of the closet I have book shelves that stretch from the floor to the roof. To the left, I have my personal books, magazines, notebooks, dvd's, sketchpads, and pictures. I didn't organize anything on these shelves because everything would get unorganized withing a day. I'm always taking stuff from there, only to be tossed back in an unorderly fashion later. To the right, theres random things that have piled up over the years. I never go back to these shelves, but I occasionally find myself putting things there. Things that I don't think Ill ever need again, but don't know if I should throw away.
I could have just thrown everything away, because I did end up throwing everything away anyway. But Everything I took out of there, I examined closely, and tried to remember how that particular item had come into my life. First it was the shelves in my closet, then my cabinets (which I have many of). It was kind of weird, like looking into my past, remembering things that I wouldn't normally remember.
It seemes like a wasted a whole day, but I kind of enjoyed it. I remembered things from my childhood, all the way through the end of high school. So far everything I've taken out, I've thrown away or set aside for donation. I really don't see anymore use for this junk.
It only took me FOUR minutes to write all this, not bad for my first post. :)